Lit-trit-ture.

Reading is such an awesome thing.
If you think about it,
and by think about it I mean really think about it,
I mean like use your brain,
you'll realize how cool reading is.

The human brain can process words.
Internalize what each word means,
then conjugate words and phrases into grammatical equations.
Then create a mental picture of the above explanation.
It's incredible.

Oh, and not only is the brain able to create an image,
but it is able to insert emotions,
connections to characters,
and even evoke strong bonds to the storyline.

Reading + The Human Brain = Awesome.

I live, I love, I slay... I am content.

I is happy.

Nosy.

nosy |ˈnōzē| (also nosey) informaladjective ( nosier , nosiest )(of a person or their behavior) showing too much curiosity about other people's affairs.
I am slightly annoyed with nosy people. There are people I WANT to tell my life to, and others that just PRY their little grubby fingers into it. I don't like it. It's okay to stalk peoples lives, I understand that some people just don't have a life of their own so they live vicariously through other people. (P.S. That's sarcastic) But just because you are a master creep and find out interesting deets about other people it doesn't mean you have to share it with the whole world.
Why don't you just pick my nose, you nosy thing!?

Divine Comedy

"You plan the first date, she'll plan the rest of your eternity."

Found this on YouTube, thought it was a great LDS Spoof. Hope it makes you all laugh as hard as I did.

Divine Comedy--Provo Utah Girls

Good, dood, pood.

It's days like these that make all the bad days worthwhile. Without the bad days we wouldn't understand how good the good days really are.

Today was a good day. I slept in to my hearts extent, ate a breakfast of multi-grain cheerios with strawberries straight out of the strawberry womb (off the vine, I just felt like using the term womb), sat in the sun on the back porch and talked to my Mom, then made myself a super awesome lunch WHICH I transported to work with me in my very own lunch box made my good chum Kaitlyn Manscill, I worked and enjoyed listening to some new tunes, was visited by my bestest buddies Kentron and Kaitlyn, was told I looked young by two co-workers (in a good way, not an infantile assessment), had a small child that was climbing on top of a car in the OPL parking lot yell that my hair looked cute, and I get to play with another one of my favorite people tonight! Isn't it funny how the smallest things can make you so happy?

What good happened in your day today?

Meh.

meh meh meh.

Meh.

Dreams 6/22

I will probably post a lot about my dreams here, because honestly I tend to have a LOT of really bizarre dreams.

When I was woken by a frantic Jane, insisting she be driven to work that second I was about to find out incredible news. Unfortunately I'll just always have to wonder, like how I still wonder about the incredible circumstances of the wardrobe in the Chronicles of Narnia.
Moving on, I was trekking through IKEA, the coolest shopping center EVER, looking for a sort of functional organizer, (Don't ask why, because I have no idea.) when I found a staircase. (Just to set the scene all the lights were out and the walls were painted black but for some reason I could still see everything clearly. It's like there was light with no lights. As I walked around IKEA an assortment of colors were used, A dark brick red, a nice lime green, PG viking blue, and bright banana yellow. Those were the only colors. All the colors were displayed as accents in rooms. For example there would be a room draped in black with a red couch, a green end table, a lamp in the corner with a yellow shade and a blue coffee table.) Back to the staircase. So I ascend the staircase when I come to a small room at the top accented with the above description and there sitting on a green kitchen stool in the middle of the room is Kurt Winkler. (A guy from my singles ward who is majoring in Library Science to be a Librarian.) I walk into the room and there is crew of film makers setting the scene for some sort of production but I have no idea what it's for. Kurt walks up to me and shakes my hand while saying, "Hannah, welcome to my room, I have the coolest trick to show you." Of course this is totally normal and I say "Okay, what is it!?" Overly emphatic. Then he stares into my eyes intensely and says "Watch this, I can light my eyes on fire." I stare at his eyes when suddenly his iris's turn the color of flames. It was incredible, my eyes started to burn and I had the most intense desire to "light my eyes like his." He stopped the gaze from being so intense and his iris's slowly faded back into a crystal clear blue.
Here I was woken, now I don't know how to light my eyes on fire. I'm so disappointed.

Cool Dream huh?

The Flawless Skin of Ugly People.

I just started reading this book called, get this, "The Flawless Skin of Ugly People." I checked it out just because I loved the title. Who knew it could be so insightful. I want to share the quote from the inside cover, it is beyond genius.

"The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only way that the mediocre and vile can be transformed, and (c) doing that makes it that. We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love." -Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker

Love it. It's so true.

Anxiety

anxiety |a ng ˈzī-itē|

noun ( pl. -ties)

a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. Anxiety is a natural part of human existence, and it can come into the scene without provocation, usually at the worst possible moment. 

I just wanted to take a moment and express how grateful I am to be apart of the LDS religion. Heavenly Father always seems to steady my boat when I insist on rocking it. Today specifically I felt some unease about "something with an uncertain outcome" and I was given a feeling of peace, and I know that everything will work out how it is supposed to. Sometimes we just have to steer our boat in the direction we think is right and if our course is wrong Heavenly Father with send gentle waves to guide us back to the correct direction.

"In the end, the number of prayers we say may contribute to our happiness, but the number of prayers we answer may be of even greater importance."

-Dieter F. Uchtdorf.

God works in mysterious ways, but I know that working through other people is definitely one of them. Continue to pray diligently and answer prayers as you have opportunities. That's all for my moment of deep thoughts. Good Night.

Sleepy Sundays

Sunday is the perfect nap day. Movies are also perfect for Sunday. I am currently on a romance kick. I am a hopeless romantic. I think I'll go take a nap now.

ABC... Hannah.

Super Random, but alas a freakin' cool idea. 
You write the questions that all start with a letter of the alphabet, and answer them. :)
Now you will all know more about me than I'm sure you EVER wanted to know.

A: Abnormalities?

I had a Growth Hormone Disorder in my childhood-adolesence. (My pituitary gland stopped producing growth hormone for my body, in result I stopped growing. Literally.) I had to inject myself with prosthetic growth hormones once a day, everyday for 4 years. My (injection) pen was super cool though. "Norditropin". I called it Nerdi-tropin.

I also have a skin... thing. I have bizarre freckle patches on HALF of my body. There is literally a distinct line that goes down my neck showing the line "they [You] shall not pass." -LOTR. 

B: Black or Brown?

I love the color Black. Hands Down.

C: Cat or Dog?

We have 4 cats around here. (Yes that's a lot... I am VERY aware.) Hickory (Scottish Fold "Defect" his ears don't fold). Cinders (Russian Blue). Jazz-purr (Abyssinian, my parents were really into the Jazz at that time). And the most recent addition to the family Sushi (Orange Tabby). If I could pick a dog (even though I am irrationally scared of them) I think it would be a Golden Retriever.

D: Dream?

Worst dream I've ever had was probably this mornings, my Dad killed himself. *Shudder*

Best dream I've ever had I found a stash of money in my bookshelf. A LOT of money.

E: Estimated Death Age?

Ever since I was a small child I've wanted to live till I'm 103. Don't ask why, that's just it. I've always loved what Winnie the Pooh said to Christopher Robbin "If you live to be 100, I hope I live to be 100 minus 1 day, so I never have to live without you."

F: Flavor?

Sour, but not so sour that you want to die (Sour War heads Candy). Like Sour Trolli Gummy Worms.

G: Groom?

Someday I'll be a bride. LOL

H: Human?

My favorite Human in this world is John Bytheway. I have a signed copy of one of his CD's.

I: Instrument?
Unfortunately I don't play any instruments (Other than the Harry Potter intro theme that I taught myself by ear on the piano) but if I could I would play the Saxophone or the Base. (Don't laugh, I know I'd probably need a chair. Shut up.)

J: Jargon?
Okay not a question, but I love this word. Maybe I should change the name of my blog to "Invasion of the Juggernaut Jargon."

K: Kite?
I've never owned one of the super cool kites with a long tail that swirls all around, but I've always wanted one like that. Or one with little razors so I can obliterate other peoples kites ha ha ha... (That's what my dad says he used to do... I kinda want to try it...) This is why my mom says I'll never have kids.

L: Literary Work?
Considering I work at a Library, I can't even begin to list them all, but Harry Potter will always be #1. However, the book that really got me into reading, other than HP, is called "Molly Moons Incredible Book of Hypnotism."

M: Music?
It changes on a regular basis, but today I like "Breakable" by Ingrid Michaelson.

N: Name Meaning?

Grace of God -Hebrew

O: Outdoors?
Yes, I love to be outside. Especially when the weather is bad. I have always liked it when the weather is out of control, maybe because that's how I feel inside. Like how you never know what your future holds, but in the end you know it will all work out. With storms and natural disasters there will always be people to help you clean up the wreckage, just like Heavenly Father and The Savior. :)

P: Precipitation?
My favorite weather is rain. But a very specific type of rain. The ultimate weather for me (I honestly have weather induced moods, this is when I'm happiest.) is when the sky is near black, thunder, super windy, and raining really hard, but it's warm rain.

Q: Question?

I don't know? (It's a question ha ha)

R: Religion?

LDS trumps all. "the Mormon's were right." -South Park (I don't watch that show because it's sort of rank, but we watched a clip in seminary so it must be okay.)

S: Saying?
A saying I have always thought funny is hanging in my grandma's house. It says "If mama ain't happy ain't nobody happy, if daddy ain't happy don't nobody care." haha.

T: Time Management?
I am known as "The Piddler" as my house because I have the most unique talent. I can waste time like it's nobody's business. For example, right now I'm supposed to be cleaning my room...but here I am. It's impossible for me to never have something to do.

U: Underwear of Choice?
I like regular panties haha. My lucky pair of underwear (yes I have a pair! haha) are solid black. They match my super rad black sports bra. I pretend that if I wore a bikini that would be as sexy as it gets lol. Get it? Because sports bras and underwear aren't considered sexy... or maybe they are...

V: VL?
Yes. I probably will be forever ha ha. I cranky old cat lady, that yells at kids to get off her lawn, as for now I don't mind.

W: Worthless Body Attribute?
My last two toes curl towards the inner toes. So they have this weird ridge where they have been pressed down by my weight. Super bizarre.

X: Xavia
This isn't a question really, but I've always like this name. Heard it in a song. (pronounced Ex-Ae-Via)

Y: Young?
My family always jokes that I will have all girls because I would be the perfect boy mom. I am impartial, I think I'd enjoy them both. (but if my girls are super...girly... heaven help me because I won't know what to do with them.) I've always wanted to adopt a child though, that would just be so cool.

Z: Zoo Animal?

I have a special connection to the wild cats at the Zoo, similar to the connection Harry Potter has with the snake in book one of the Harry Potter series. I'd have to say Tiger specifically. It could just be my imagination but I swear they always stare at me when I'm looking in their confinement quarters.

And wow, this is ridiculously long, don't even bother reading it. It's pure nonsense anyway... 

Let's go fly a kite, up to the highest height, and send it soaring...

Pterodactyl (Flying Lizard)

Okay, so I guess today is a blogging kind of day!
It was just so eventful I have to document it all!

On account of how bloody windy it was, I decided
to take the smallish child (Elliott, the 10 year old)
to fly kites. The kite I purchased (That was also only
$3.99) fit the occasion perfectly... especially
considering my recent Jurassic Park Obsession.

Chad Nelson 2

Lips

By: Chad Nelson

Crazeee Patteee,

and Sid Farkle Bleu

Kissed, neigh they smooched,

Till her lips grew and grew...

The moment arrived...

As their naughty affair ended 

most sadly, Pat's lips, Sid did share.

(Or she swallowed him whole.)

Chad Nelson

I have this neighbor named Chad Nelson and he is probably one of the most amusing people I've ever met. He let me have these two poems that he wrote/illustrated. This guy is so clever, I think he did these both in less than ten minutes.

This is a photo-booth photo of the original
because you just can't get the same effect
without the picture of "Chester F. Nestor".

Chester Fiddle-Nestor
By: Chad Nelson

Chester Fiddle-Nestor
Twiddled his thumbs
While whistling a ditty
Regarding large bums.

Polite folk who dwelt
In the hamlet so fair,
Chimed in together
"Chester F. Nestor,
How could you dare?"

"I care and I dare"
Said Chester out loud.
"For simply I say
I'm fat and I'm proud."

"It's Canyon Time."

Wind in my hair, and sun on my face.

I dare say this is a beautiful, beautiful place.

Wheeling cross the ground in a rapid affair,

I feel the ground crunch with a groan of despair.

The trees, a lush green and wild flowers, blooming,

and dog poop in abundance is always looming. :)

Where am I?

It's a place that I love to be whenever I can as of recently. (By recently I mean summer) It's the Provo Canyon River Trail. Otherwise known as the Provo Parkway Trail. I'm also kind of a roller blading addict. I've always loved it, but since I can't seem to get my body (specifically my right foot/shin) healthy, roller blading has been that nice medium. Running is too much impact and causes stress into my shins, but blading is just a nice smooth movement that works your legs out really good. "Yeah, buns and thighs." (Shout out to Carmen). I can't seem to get enough blading. I'm proud to say I'm getting pretty good. Today I bladed from the mouth of the canyon to Bridal-veil Falls. It was a good long ride, but was well worth it considering Elliott and my Mama were riding along with me...on bikes. I can do a rounded turn into a backwards roll. (if that even makes sense.) Ask me to demonstrate sometime, I'd love to show you because for me this is a major feat.

Word #1

WORD OF CHOICE: Clad


clad 1 |klad|
past participle of clothe
"I saw various Scantily CLAD women at the summer-fest."

L.O.V.E.

"I'm in love, I'm in love and I don't care who knows it."

That statement is such a lie.
Firstly because I do care who knows it,  (unlike some people.)
and I'm not really in love.

Call me Captain Pessimist.



Okay I lied... so maybe I'm not "in love" but I'm for sure "in like."
I don't know what to do with myself. I hate this feeling. (Is that messed up or what?) Most people love it, but I just find it controlling. I hate not being able to manage a single thought without it being interrupted by *Yo I'm this super annoying thought, think of me instead of what you're trying to think about...*. It's like I ordered a Krabby Patty, with extra Krabby...

I think I need to just give in and just let myself have a boyfriend instead of being a hard hearted old hag...

Or else I need to quit eating ice cream sandwiches and reading Jurassic Park before bed.

I Will Read UNTIL...

Admittedly stolen from Kaitlyn Manscill.

Nook advertisement.

"Till all the books are read,

and all the pens are put down,

and everything there is to learn is learned.

Till the tears are no longer shed,

and the zingers have all zinged,

and the irony is all ironed out.

Till the heroes retire,

and the monsters return to their dens,

and all the plots are wrapped up.

Till there are no more twists or turns,

no more guns and draws,

no more shaggy dogs.

Till rhymes stops rhyming,

and pots stop boiling,

and everyone is happy,

and there is nothing more to say.

Till that day-I will read!"

POOP

P- People
O- Order
O- Our
P- Patties

Shout out to Carmen Thorley.